He used to put the "Fun" in "Fun House" - but these days we've got the feeling that Pat Sharp prefers a good rant.

If he's not fuming over one thing, it's something else. And yesterday his attention turned to Trial screamer Sinitta.

“She looks ridiculous. She’s wimping around on this show,” Pat told Mark, Dougie, Crissy and Jessica-Jane before starting on Lorraine.

“Lorraine is the nicest woman I’ve ever met. Her holding a teddy is sweet but it doesn’t work in here, she’s not four years old, she’s 60 and she wraps it up and puts it to bed. I don’t get it. There is no room in here for nice a person, that’s naff, saccharine, sweet.

“Her teddy is called Tedward, given the choice I would strangle Tedward over Jedward – that makes you realise how angry I am.”

His rant was interrupted by Lorraine who peered out from the sin bin and asked him for a cup of water and he told her she was a nice person “but you’re too nice for me. Don’t walk past just saying look at the lovely trees.”

Watch out Lorraine, you don’t want a Pat on your back!