Brave Dame Kelly Holmes talks about depression and self-harming: 'I self-harmed every day. I was in this black hole'
OLYMPIAN DAME KELLY HOLMES OPENS UP ABOUT DEPRESSION AND SELF-HARM
Dame Kelly Holmes joined the panel to discuss experiencing years of depression and self-harm during her athletics career with Katie, Andrea, Nadia and Jane in a powerful interview.
The double Olympic champion discussed how she didn’t open up to anyone due to the competitive environment when competing against the world’s best.
‘It would have been a “weakness” [to admit to suffering from depression] and it felt like your opposition have one over on you,’ Kelly explained. 'It hit me like a brick when I got into my state, I didn't want to tell anyone. I was in this black hole, it was a cloud of fog. Depression never goes but you just learn how to handle it.'
Kelly described how she began self-harming when she developed career-threatening injuries in 1997 and learnt how to hide it from people.
'People will take it out on alcohol, drugs, sex and unfortunately suicide,' she said. 'For me, self-harming was almost a relief. I did it every day. I could not see clearly and when I cut myself the first time it didn't feel painful. I used to hide it with make up and you do it in places you can't see.’
Kelly said she first opened up about her mental health in 2005 when it wasn’t spoken about but she says now ‘high profile people such as Prince Harry need to stop the stigmatism. All of us go through problems in life, you’ve got to have people listening.’
Watch the full video to see Dame Kelly discuss her experience of depression frankly.